Pumpkin Patch  Jokes

How do you mend a broken Jack-o-lantern?

With a pumpkin patch!

Why do jack-o-lanterns have stupid smiles on their faces?
You'd have a stupid smile, too, if you had just had all your brains scooped out!

• Why did Dracula's mother give him cough medicine?
  Because he was having a coffin fit.

• What did Dr. Frankenstein get when he put a goldfish brain in the body of his dog?
  I don't know, but it is great at chasing submarines.

• Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party?'
  Cause everyone was a goblin.

• Why did the vampire's lunch give him heartburn?
  It was a stake sandwich.

• Dracula decided he need a dog, which breed did he choose?
  A blood hound.